I’ve locked myself out of my house! OH NOOOOOOOO! I don’t have my keys, no one’s inside and the doors are all locked. The old saying that “When God locks a door, he opens a window,” does NOT apply here. I’ve checked… twice. All the windows are locked too. WAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!
I don’t know anyone that hasn’t been locked out of their car or home at some point in their life. Sometimes you are able to have someone bring you a duplicate key and all you suffer is a little time lost and embarrassment. Other times you break a window, call a locksmith or the creepy guy you know that swears he can open any thing, every time. Always the less desirable choice.
I bring this up because Prentice and I went for a midnight walk last night. As we went out the front door he said, “You don’t have to lock it. We won’t be gone that long.” I pointed out to him that we've never been able to keep a lawn mower longer than a week without someone at least attempting to steal it. So, I felt in my pocket for the keys. Feeling superior in my role as responsible “guardian of the home and hearth” I discovered the weight, shape and jingle that defined KEYS, turned the lock button on the inside doorknob and shut the door. In deference to Prentice’s feelings I didn’t lock the dead bolt. That probably would have been overkill.
After a leisurely walk around the neighborhood hand in hand discussing the events of the day, we kissed on the front porch and I removed the keys from my pocket. None of the keys worked, at least not on the doorknob lock. They did work on the dead bolt. I was able to lock and unlock it with both of the keys on the key ring.
We used to keep spare keys under an “undisclosed location” until a few years back. Someone removed the keys, and we had to change all the locks. It may have been our son, home for a visit and not willing to "fess up", but I wasn’t about to take that chance. Whatever the case, last night we were well and truly locked out.
We checked every window we could reach. Locked… securely… with wide eyed cats peering out, curious as to why their silly humans are playing this stupid game. Any window we could reach from the outside they could reach inside. Why, oh why couldn’t they have opposable thumbs?
Long story short, we finally got in after a couple of hours of trying. I won’t admit in a public forum how we did it, some things are best left unsaid, but no one has ever been able to say that we give up without a fight. At least none of the neighbors called the police.
Though I was tired, sore and cross when we finally got in, Prentice consoled me with a hug, chuckled and reminded me of something our old friend Brian would always say at the most inappropriate times: “Don’t let this get you down. It's just another scene in life’s rich, rich pageant.”
When this kind of thing happens most people are usually fortunate. They aren't late for an important appointment that's vital to their job. There is no frying pan on the stove with the burner left on. They aren't in a rush to get to the hospital where a loved one might lay dying. They don’t have an infant or pet in their locked car on a hot day. Being locked out isn’t as important or worrisome when the stakes aren’t very high.
Tomorrow, I’m investing in duplicate keys for my house and car. I'm also investing in a way to securely keep them hidden in a place I can get to in an emergency. I think I’ll go for a fake rock and put it in a friend’s yard.
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Be careful with the fake rocks. Thieves actually look for these and if they are near your front door you might find that you just gave a burglar your key. A place I like a knothole in a tree at the side of my houes. I can put the key in a plastic sandwich bag to keep it dry and clean and stick the whole thing into the knothole where it can’t be seen.